I can honestly say that my time here in Korea has been quite informative. While I do believe that I have been relatively independent since graduating from high school, by the definition of independence that marks my generation, I have see now that I have learned what true independece is. Not only is it this sense of independence that I have come to discover, but also what it means to be an adult. Turning twenty-five this year, while I still admit is quite young, made me feel much more accountable for my actions and my future. This past birthday like no other I can honestly say I felt older.
Many of the decisions in my life up until this point have been relatively simple. This is not to say they were minor or easy but easy by comparison to many of the tough situations I was confronted with in Korea--learning true financial independence and the value of the "buck" you earn and manage yourself, having to make decisions that could hurt others professionally because it is what is right for you professionally, and having to manage my life unlike I had to in college or during my first year of work as a teacher at Hagerty high school.
It has been tough for me here because for the first time I didn't have more money than I knew what to do with. I don't say this to gloat; what I mean is that for my lifestyle in the past, I have always had ample financial support whether from my own earnings or the support I received from my family during college (when playing two sports, there is no time for a job). There is, in Korea, always a bar to go, a beer to drink, a place to see. And having to employ discretion and budget money has become and intrical part of my time here and invaluable lesson learned. The foreigner lifestyle is a money pit. Consider the average twenty-something on the other side of the world from perceived responisiblity that is getting paid a decent wage with minimal work hours; that is an equation for reckless spending and frivolous living. I have fallen into these pitfalls while in Korea, but I know what it is like to scrounge for the last almond in the cupboard when I've spent too much. Also, while I have been here I have had to pay my college loans, pay off credit cards and deal with all of the horrible exchange rates and transfer fees. When having to do this, I had to be even more cautious about my financial situation. That being said, on to the more interesting topics.
I was confronted with the greatest conundrum of my young life in the past few weeks, quitting my job. This may not seem so bad considering all of the valid reasons mentioned in blogs past that my academy has given me to quit. The kicker is that the academy that I work at is about to go under. Their money is dwindling because of their poor business practices and lack of professionalism. Is this my problem? No. However, my boss is an exceptionally kind man, in a social atmosphere. Unfortunately, he lacks any sparse amount of business accumen. He offers to take me to his home on holidays, he brings me food that his wife cooks for me, he openly acknowledges how much he enjoys me at the academy; he is sweet, sincere, and endearing, but he can never follow through in his business. He doesn't discipline the kids, was very deceptive about my vacation time, did not allow me sick days, and did not follow through on contractual agreements that would given me a great advantage in the classroom (I know how this must read as contrary to what I just said about his character but have you ever met someone you just couldn't condemn, that you always end up forgiving?)
The problem? Another teacher who was offered a better job recently quit as well. He told me Mr. Koo (goo) was at the point of tears. He is a family man and supports them on his money from the academies. He recently told me his wife yells at him all the time because of the business problems. The decision got tough for me when I considered that I could stay just four more months and finish my contract and the academy would probably survive the winter; however, it now seems that the academy will go out of business before Christmas. This hurt me quite a bit because I know what it will mean for his family (I teach two of his daughters as well), I know what it means for the other teachers, and all of the students, the cherished few, that truly enjoy their time at the academy. What would it cost me to prevent this--four short months. I even went in a week after quitting to tell him I would stay but guess what happened. I go in and there is trash from kids all over my classroom and in my first class I had to argue with a student for ten minutes, literally, to get them to read. And when I asked for help controlling the student, there wasn't any.
How did I eventually keep my resolve to quit? I thought to myself how my four months would only delay the inevitable for four more months. I realized that I was vain to think that I was the solution to the problem when I realized that I had no part in the problem to begin with. I feel these words don't accurately portray the guilt I felt initially or the emotions I was dealing with, but believe me when I say it was so.
In all my life, as I have said before, the right path was easy to see. I graduated from high school and had a chance to go to college and play sports, easy. I graduated from college and knew I wanted to teach. The day of graduation a new high school in Oviedo called me and offered me an American Literature position, easy. I didn't like teaching and always had a secret desire to join the military, easy. But ever since being injured and going through the whole OCS debaucle not everything has been so clear. I do know that upon arriving back in the states I will go back to the military, but I still am struck with this nearly two-year old sense of uncertainty and restlessness. I feel that it is probably because I never had many bumps in the road until OCS and didn't know how to deal with it, although I am beginning to learn and understand how natural the bumps in the road are in adult life.
As for the restlessness, I was talking to my cousin Myka yesterday, and she said something to me that struck a chord. We were talking, and she said to me, "Where are you again?" While innocent words to her, I felt them on a different level. I thought to myself, "WHERE am I?" I am tired of moving around. I am tired of feeling restless. I am nervous to settle down only to find how much I want to be on the move again. I moved back and forth from house to house in high school, back and forth from college to home but mostly at college, was at home for a while before going to OCS, then back to Orlando for a short stint before hitting the road to Korea. I am tired of running around and a little worried that this will be the lifestyle that defines my twenties and early-thirties. It is coming to feel like an impersonal lifestyle of moving from network to network with no sense of belonging or community.
I reflect on this a lot and often it gets me down, but I realize that this is no new problem; this is an issue wrestled by every young man and woman today. For some it comes easier than others, but most deal with this I believe.
In the end I have found that I am sound in my decision making and that decisions in the business world must be made with your best interests in mind. Of course there is time to show compassion , which I know I can do, but the hard part of life is knowing when this time is. When is it time to act selflessly? That lesson I have yet to learn. I want to reiterate that I am capable of being compassionate in my personal and social life, but I believe there is little, which is to say there is limited, time for it in the world of business. It is sad but true. Don't believe me? Watch Wall Street or take a lesson from AIG, Goldman Sachs, or the Lehman Brothers. Money is not a toy; you have to take care of yourself because no one else will! While you yourself may be compassionate, many others are not.
As my since of restlessness still remains, and I do not feel content yet, then I cannot offer a lesson learned. This unfortunately is a period in life where no lesson can be taken until the chapter has been completed. I guess that is the tragedy of life, we can only live progressively or in retrospect. All I can do is to wake up each day anew and try to live progressively because regret isn't practical.
I will leave you with my favorite quote by Tennyson from his poem Ulysses
"...And drunk delight of battle with my peers;
far on the ringing plains of Troy.
I am a part of all that I have met;
Yet all experience is an arch wherethrough
Gleams that untravelled world, whose margin fades
For ever and for ever when I move.
How dull it is to pause, to make an end,
To rust unburnished, not to shine in use!
As though to breathe were life, Life piled on life
Were all to little, and of one to me
Little remains: but every hour is saved
From that eternal silence, something more,
A bringer of new things; and vile it were
For some three suns to store and hoard myself,
And this grey spirit yearning in desire
To follow knowledge like a sinking star,
Beyond the utmost bound of human thought."
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Monday, August 24, 2009
The Posts to Come
Tomorrow I will post the first of three posts that will reflect upon my time in Korea. Why you ask, would he be reflecting so soon before his contract is up? Because I have quit my job here and will be coming home on September 12; this will be explained in the blogs to come. I plan to reflect now and not later because while I believe that some experiences here were a waste, I still maintain that there are some valuable lessons that I have learned and this brings me to the topics of my blogs--
1) Reflections on what I have learned about myself in my time here
2) Reflections on what I have learned about the world I live in in my time here
3) Reflections, as objective as possible, on what I have learned about Korea and its inhabitants
The first will be posted on what I believe will be mid-day Wednesday. Thanks for reading; I really appreciate those of you who have read. I hope you have enjoyed. Stay Tuned.
William Reedy
1) Reflections on what I have learned about myself in my time here
2) Reflections on what I have learned about the world I live in in my time here
3) Reflections, as objective as possible, on what I have learned about Korea and its inhabitants
The first will be posted on what I believe will be mid-day Wednesday. Thanks for reading; I really appreciate those of you who have read. I hope you have enjoyed. Stay Tuned.
William Reedy
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Organized Religion
I don't have much to write about lately but my brother's blog struck a chord with me. He said, to paraphrase, that he is having a "crisis of faith" and is unsure what his religious views are. Yet, he does feel that there is some divine power working in the world.
"The blood of "Christendom" is oppression and manipulation thru skewed theology and the formation of hierarchical systems." ~ Mark Twain, A Connecticut Yankee in King Authur's Court
First: Organized religion
Organized religion grew organically out of early social constructs. People sought to identify themselves and how they related to the world. They began to settle and to create civiliaztions. These civilazations began to distinguish themselves in many ways--through language, dress, tradition, worldviews(how they fit into the world). These worldviews amongst different cultures soon grew into religions that became major facets of their daily lives (i.e. commerce & trade, daily routines, socialization--both secular and religious). As we all know from these rudimentary days of religion "the church" and religion in the universal sense of their definitions took on much greater and pronounced roles in their day to day lives.
Second: Why there is no Christian god
I believe there is no Christian god for many reasons. First, major religions, along with their deities, have sprung up geographically through out the world. Where worldviews are different so are religions. Traditionally speaking, in India, we have Hinduism & Bhuddism, Bhuddism bleeds into Western China where there is Bhuddism, Confuciansim, and Taoism, this then bleeds into the far East into Japan and Korea where we have Confucianism, and Taoism; however, today there are no more noticeable dividing lines. If there is one, omnipotent Jewish/Christian God, then why did he not reveal himself to humans before the hebrews? Why did he choose only this one part of the earth to reveal himself? Because this was the way that the Hebrews began to understand and make since of their world or perhaps to cope with their oppressors, a product of suffering; this is the way their religion evolved. Judahism and Christianity are composed of so many other religions that it is quite comical to think it unique. All of these predate Christianity and were organized religions from the same geographical location, Syria, Egypt, Macedonia, and so on.
Third: Christianity is appealing
Christianity and Judahism were and are appealing. This god in Christendom is not vengeful unlike many of its contemporary polytheistic rivals with gods that used humans as play things, and were vindictive and angry rulers (reference any mythology out of Ancient, Greece, Rome, Babylon, Egypt, and so on.)
The God of the Old Testament was vengeful and wrathful, but he was an immanent god that was very real in every minute of their lives, who pronounced undying love for his people, and promised the dejected Jews that they would thrive. This deity was not a god that would throw lightning bolts at them from a far off places when the mood struck. God, in his covenant with Abraham, set forth a guide and with Moses rules, by which they were to live their lives and be faithful to their creator. It was very clear on how to worship and how to live; they weren't hanging in limbo about whether or not they pissed their god off that day, unlike the animistic religions that were beginning to die out at the time.
But this idea of one ultimate god who has got your back, as long as you keep the faith and the covenant, is very appealing to people, A) who are poor (it costs less to tithe or sacrifice to one god instead of 10 or 15), and B) who were getting dominated by all the polytheistic religions of the region. And take a guess why the "Land of Milk and Honey" was in the middle of the desert. Because there never was one; it was a story to get people to join the exodus. The nile in Egypt was more fertile than anywhere they would end up. People followed Moses into the desert because of the appeal of the God's promise coupled with the fear and suffering at the hands of their Egyptian masters.
Why else is Judahism and modern day Christianity appealing. These two religions were the first to truly label and market the idea of faith, thus making them foolproof and unarguable. Oh you can't see God and so you don't believe he is real. Well you don't have faith! I can't see the air I breath, but I know it's real (that little anecdote makes me ill to my stomach). It sounds like a cute little counter argument some third grade children's churcher made up, an I hear it from adults and laugh. It is hard to discount a religion when you can't even argue it. Arguing with a devoutly faithful person is like hitting your head against a wall.
This idea of faith and safety in numbers, as well as, and I admit, charming since of charity and compassion found in the religion, made it quite appealing to people of weaker religious faiths, weaker civilizations(poor people, poor countries). Yeah I will worship your god, I am starving and have no food or protection, give me that bread and you can have my soul. I am certain that I am going to hell for the deeds I have done. There is something to be said for the stereotype of jailhouse salvation. What is that the Christian God pardons all sins as long as I believe; okay I believe.
Not only the appeal of the religions helped it to spread through the world. It is well documented how the strong arms of Judahism and Christianity, just like Rome, helped to spread the religion. The bottom line is that Christianity was the first religion to come along that was quite nearly fullproof to all second-guessers. No one was able to successfully debunk the flaws of the foundations of Judahism and Christiantiy, and by the Age of Enlightment and the publishing of The Origin of Species, these two religions were already dug in for the fight.
Fourth: Christianity has no backbone
Christianity has no backbone. We bend and break the bible and put it back together so that we can justify just about whatever we want. "Be neither hot nor cold, for I will spew you out" I take this to mean two things. Live the Christian life with full faith and commitment, and that the Christian way of life is no penumbra; it is a black and white religion just as the Old Testament supposes. In referencing the Old Testament, (NOT MY BELIEFS) if a man lies with a man this is an abomination and he is to be killed. If a woman lies with another man whom is not her husband, then she is stoned to death. In the New Testament the message is love and compassion. So this obviously means that all men are equal and will forever be forgiven, so our perspective on sin changes. People say oh that is just Old Testament hub bub, the bible is symbolic not literal now. Funny how 150 years ago Christians who don't readily accept the harsh ways of the Old Testament "hub bub" used the Old Testament to justify slavery. Now we reject it so they can justify forgiveness for any sin. Christianity has become a farce to say the least with numerous theological and biblical contradictions. I mean Jesus, just look how man different religions exist and within these religions, sects and denominations. I used to feel like that Nazi dude from Indiana Jones who was looking for the Holy Grail. The last thing I wanted to do was get to St. Peter and hear him say, "You chose POORLY! Actually the Mormans were right."
It is so funny to me that people have so much faith in a book with superhuman men, talking animals, water walking, talking bushes, and all other kinds of unexplainable phenomena. Did a burning bush speak to moses, did women came from Adam's rib, did Jesus walked on water? (And Christians laugh at L. Ron Hubbard) Why do these things exist in the bible. Because they were superstitious people who lived in a time without science. Now that we have scientific law Christians and Jews alike, rebuke the stories as literal translations and say that it was meant to be deep and symbolic. So the ten commandments are meant to be literal but not far from that the burning bush was meant to be symbolic? Come on you can't pick and choose.
__________________________________________________________________
I do believe in a God however; I just don't believe in a Christian god. Humans possess a deep and abstract self-awareness; a phenomena that exists nowhere else in the world. We are people that live according to concscience, employing our analytical, self-aware minds. We have the ability to do things like no one else in the known universe. This power comes from somewhere. Consider art. These abstract creations that directly reflect us. I believe humans are the highest art, for we are an artistic expression as well because any creation is an artistic endeavor.
Some will say that God cannot exist in our world, the way that science defines it. But remember God is not a part of our world, at least not the way we define God as being transcendent. So if God is not part of our world then what makes our laws apply to God. But then again what makes our notions of semantics and categorization apply to the holy. We cannot, no matter how hard we try to, put a finger on God. God is undefinable and untouchable. So why try. I do know that humans are special and that something divine exists in us; I know that there is a clear order in the world that exists from our concscience, a moral law. This moral notion existed before religion, it is natural to the world and to humans. I believe that if we live in accordance to the moral nature of the world, the way it was made, then if there is a judgement day we won't be condemned.
Religion, over time, has grown into a social construct that is manipulated by the powerful to breed fear, guilt, and conformation to secular political and social views. Religion is dead weight. People, in my general opinion, are religious for two reasons: First because their parents were; it spreads through family tradition like any other gene(an exaggerated point). Why do you go to church? Because my parents did and their parents did and nobody thought to ask why. And why ask why, which brings me to number two. In the right context, the moral fiber offered with the correct and temperate theological views make for a very satisfying atmosphere. Add to that a charismatic environment with good spiritual leaders and a real sense of community and fellowship, and one can't deny the advantages of the Christian church life. And finally as a point contained in both these reasons, there is a social pressure that exists in church life; we gain a reputation as being, or at least attempting to be, morally sound and pious. To tarnish either of those values in a public arena is a serious pressure to be considered.
I don't have a beef with anyone who is religious. God bless you you're trying. And for all we know I could be wrong, but I believe my logic is sound. If logic is a gift from a god, then I think he is smiling on me.
SORRY FOR ANY TYPOS.
"The blood of "Christendom" is oppression and manipulation thru skewed theology and the formation of hierarchical systems." ~ Mark Twain, A Connecticut Yankee in King Authur's Court
First: Organized religion
Organized religion grew organically out of early social constructs. People sought to identify themselves and how they related to the world. They began to settle and to create civiliaztions. These civilazations began to distinguish themselves in many ways--through language, dress, tradition, worldviews(how they fit into the world). These worldviews amongst different cultures soon grew into religions that became major facets of their daily lives (i.e. commerce & trade, daily routines, socialization--both secular and religious). As we all know from these rudimentary days of religion "the church" and religion in the universal sense of their definitions took on much greater and pronounced roles in their day to day lives.
Second: Why there is no Christian god
I believe there is no Christian god for many reasons. First, major religions, along with their deities, have sprung up geographically through out the world. Where worldviews are different so are religions. Traditionally speaking, in India, we have Hinduism & Bhuddism, Bhuddism bleeds into Western China where there is Bhuddism, Confuciansim, and Taoism, this then bleeds into the far East into Japan and Korea where we have Confucianism, and Taoism; however, today there are no more noticeable dividing lines. If there is one, omnipotent Jewish/Christian God, then why did he not reveal himself to humans before the hebrews? Why did he choose only this one part of the earth to reveal himself? Because this was the way that the Hebrews began to understand and make since of their world or perhaps to cope with their oppressors, a product of suffering; this is the way their religion evolved. Judahism and Christianity are composed of so many other religions that it is quite comical to think it unique. All of these predate Christianity and were organized religions from the same geographical location, Syria, Egypt, Macedonia, and so on.
Third: Christianity is appealing
Christianity and Judahism were and are appealing. This god in Christendom is not vengeful unlike many of its contemporary polytheistic rivals with gods that used humans as play things, and were vindictive and angry rulers (reference any mythology out of Ancient, Greece, Rome, Babylon, Egypt, and so on.)
The God of the Old Testament was vengeful and wrathful, but he was an immanent god that was very real in every minute of their lives, who pronounced undying love for his people, and promised the dejected Jews that they would thrive. This deity was not a god that would throw lightning bolts at them from a far off places when the mood struck. God, in his covenant with Abraham, set forth a guide and with Moses rules, by which they were to live their lives and be faithful to their creator. It was very clear on how to worship and how to live; they weren't hanging in limbo about whether or not they pissed their god off that day, unlike the animistic religions that were beginning to die out at the time.
But this idea of one ultimate god who has got your back, as long as you keep the faith and the covenant, is very appealing to people, A) who are poor (it costs less to tithe or sacrifice to one god instead of 10 or 15), and B) who were getting dominated by all the polytheistic religions of the region. And take a guess why the "Land of Milk and Honey" was in the middle of the desert. Because there never was one; it was a story to get people to join the exodus. The nile in Egypt was more fertile than anywhere they would end up. People followed Moses into the desert because of the appeal of the God's promise coupled with the fear and suffering at the hands of their Egyptian masters.
Why else is Judahism and modern day Christianity appealing. These two religions were the first to truly label and market the idea of faith, thus making them foolproof and unarguable. Oh you can't see God and so you don't believe he is real. Well you don't have faith! I can't see the air I breath, but I know it's real (that little anecdote makes me ill to my stomach). It sounds like a cute little counter argument some third grade children's churcher made up, an I hear it from adults and laugh. It is hard to discount a religion when you can't even argue it. Arguing with a devoutly faithful person is like hitting your head against a wall.
This idea of faith and safety in numbers, as well as, and I admit, charming since of charity and compassion found in the religion, made it quite appealing to people of weaker religious faiths, weaker civilizations(poor people, poor countries). Yeah I will worship your god, I am starving and have no food or protection, give me that bread and you can have my soul. I am certain that I am going to hell for the deeds I have done. There is something to be said for the stereotype of jailhouse salvation. What is that the Christian God pardons all sins as long as I believe; okay I believe.
Not only the appeal of the religions helped it to spread through the world. It is well documented how the strong arms of Judahism and Christianity, just like Rome, helped to spread the religion. The bottom line is that Christianity was the first religion to come along that was quite nearly fullproof to all second-guessers. No one was able to successfully debunk the flaws of the foundations of Judahism and Christiantiy, and by the Age of Enlightment and the publishing of The Origin of Species, these two religions were already dug in for the fight.
Fourth: Christianity has no backbone
Christianity has no backbone. We bend and break the bible and put it back together so that we can justify just about whatever we want. "Be neither hot nor cold, for I will spew you out" I take this to mean two things. Live the Christian life with full faith and commitment, and that the Christian way of life is no penumbra; it is a black and white religion just as the Old Testament supposes. In referencing the Old Testament, (NOT MY BELIEFS) if a man lies with a man this is an abomination and he is to be killed. If a woman lies with another man whom is not her husband, then she is stoned to death. In the New Testament the message is love and compassion. So this obviously means that all men are equal and will forever be forgiven, so our perspective on sin changes. People say oh that is just Old Testament hub bub, the bible is symbolic not literal now. Funny how 150 years ago Christians who don't readily accept the harsh ways of the Old Testament "hub bub" used the Old Testament to justify slavery. Now we reject it so they can justify forgiveness for any sin. Christianity has become a farce to say the least with numerous theological and biblical contradictions. I mean Jesus, just look how man different religions exist and within these religions, sects and denominations. I used to feel like that Nazi dude from Indiana Jones who was looking for the Holy Grail. The last thing I wanted to do was get to St. Peter and hear him say, "You chose POORLY! Actually the Mormans were right."
It is so funny to me that people have so much faith in a book with superhuman men, talking animals, water walking, talking bushes, and all other kinds of unexplainable phenomena. Did a burning bush speak to moses, did women came from Adam's rib, did Jesus walked on water? (And Christians laugh at L. Ron Hubbard) Why do these things exist in the bible. Because they were superstitious people who lived in a time without science. Now that we have scientific law Christians and Jews alike, rebuke the stories as literal translations and say that it was meant to be deep and symbolic. So the ten commandments are meant to be literal but not far from that the burning bush was meant to be symbolic? Come on you can't pick and choose.
__________________________________________________________________
I do believe in a God however; I just don't believe in a Christian god. Humans possess a deep and abstract self-awareness; a phenomena that exists nowhere else in the world. We are people that live according to concscience, employing our analytical, self-aware minds. We have the ability to do things like no one else in the known universe. This power comes from somewhere. Consider art. These abstract creations that directly reflect us. I believe humans are the highest art, for we are an artistic expression as well because any creation is an artistic endeavor.
Some will say that God cannot exist in our world, the way that science defines it. But remember God is not a part of our world, at least not the way we define God as being transcendent. So if God is not part of our world then what makes our laws apply to God. But then again what makes our notions of semantics and categorization apply to the holy. We cannot, no matter how hard we try to, put a finger on God. God is undefinable and untouchable. So why try. I do know that humans are special and that something divine exists in us; I know that there is a clear order in the world that exists from our concscience, a moral law. This moral notion existed before religion, it is natural to the world and to humans. I believe that if we live in accordance to the moral nature of the world, the way it was made, then if there is a judgement day we won't be condemned.
Religion, over time, has grown into a social construct that is manipulated by the powerful to breed fear, guilt, and conformation to secular political and social views. Religion is dead weight. People, in my general opinion, are religious for two reasons: First because their parents were; it spreads through family tradition like any other gene(an exaggerated point). Why do you go to church? Because my parents did and their parents did and nobody thought to ask why. And why ask why, which brings me to number two. In the right context, the moral fiber offered with the correct and temperate theological views make for a very satisfying atmosphere. Add to that a charismatic environment with good spiritual leaders and a real sense of community and fellowship, and one can't deny the advantages of the Christian church life. And finally as a point contained in both these reasons, there is a social pressure that exists in church life; we gain a reputation as being, or at least attempting to be, morally sound and pious. To tarnish either of those values in a public arena is a serious pressure to be considered.
I don't have a beef with anyone who is religious. God bless you you're trying. And for all we know I could be wrong, but I believe my logic is sound. If logic is a gift from a god, then I think he is smiling on me.
SORRY FOR ANY TYPOS.
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Reflections
Sorry for not finishing my previous post. It was just going to speak on how I have not been able to sleep which has only intensified my frustrations in Korea. This actually brings me to my post today.
In a book I glanced through in regards to teaching English as a second language I saw a section on culture shock. It said there are three stages: Bliss, Depression, and Acceptance. I feel that I have only experienced two of these--Bliss and Acceptance.
When I first arrived in Korea it was a beautiful country full of possiblity. It offered a new beginning and seemed to hold the promise of unforgettable experiences. This feeling subsided after roughly two months into my phase of acceptance; however, my definition of acceptance digresses from the books outline. Actually it may contain a bit of the description of the book's Depression phase as well; although, I wouldn't actually say I was ever depressed.
I have come to accept this culture and country for what it is, a country that I do not enjoy and a culture that I do not find in the least to be conducive to my tastes and preferences. I don't understand a lot about this country. Some very fundamental parts of Korean society vex me, and I do not believe that a hundred years in this country could enlighten me, or for that matter, bring me to a state where I would enjoy life here. There are many examples that I have given of these issues in past postings. If I was called upon to give one right now I would have to say that Koreans are very loud talkers but if you speak loudly you will receive dirty looks and possibly a confrontation as did I on a certain KTX trip. Or, last weekend I went to eat at Outback and when my friends and I were seated the table of four next to us moved tables. Taxi Drivers will keep going instead of picking you up. Koreans will cut in front of you in any line at any place. Why? How rude! I have come to realize that there is a country-wide lack of common decency in respect to the treatment of strangers and foreigners. They will stare at you, be short with you, always assume that you are up to no good, and generally treat you as "less-than Korean". This does not jive with me. These are just a few examples of the many, many countless experiences I have had that do not bode well for my opinion of Korea and its people.
I reflected on this briefly a couple of nights ago, as well as my teaching experience here (and by the way, I have concluded with out question that Korean students are far more unruly and disrespectful than American). I came up with a few questions in my meditation that I have yet to answer and perhaps you can weigh in on if you like.
1) Is it bad to not like a culture?
2) Can you not like a culture yet still respect it (the answer seems quite simply to be yes when you are considering it from outsiders perspective; however it is different when you are neck-deep in a differnt culture)?
3) What does it say about you if you find a particular culture to be unsettling and unattractive? Are you narrow-minded? Are you unaccepting?
I thought of the movie "The Mission" in which the Spanish colonists are hearing the testimony of the cardinal in regards to the future of the native people. The antagonist arises and in a five minute speech speaks to the horrid, primitive culture of the native South Americans. I even went so far as to accuse myself of this short-sightedness. Perhaps I am being short in my judgements. Maybe I am just as naive as centuries of explorers who saught to condemn new cultures simply because they are different; although I have no plans to persecute the Koreans! Or maybe my seven months here is a legitimate basis for my conclusions. Hopefully, I will have an answer that is more clear after my year is finished.
KICKS ASS: I have found a safe haven in exercise and self-improvement.
SUCKS ASS: Having to dedicate myself daily-anew to trying my hardest at work and being patient with the kids.
In a book I glanced through in regards to teaching English as a second language I saw a section on culture shock. It said there are three stages: Bliss, Depression, and Acceptance. I feel that I have only experienced two of these--Bliss and Acceptance.
When I first arrived in Korea it was a beautiful country full of possiblity. It offered a new beginning and seemed to hold the promise of unforgettable experiences. This feeling subsided after roughly two months into my phase of acceptance; however, my definition of acceptance digresses from the books outline. Actually it may contain a bit of the description of the book's Depression phase as well; although, I wouldn't actually say I was ever depressed.
I have come to accept this culture and country for what it is, a country that I do not enjoy and a culture that I do not find in the least to be conducive to my tastes and preferences. I don't understand a lot about this country. Some very fundamental parts of Korean society vex me, and I do not believe that a hundred years in this country could enlighten me, or for that matter, bring me to a state where I would enjoy life here. There are many examples that I have given of these issues in past postings. If I was called upon to give one right now I would have to say that Koreans are very loud talkers but if you speak loudly you will receive dirty looks and possibly a confrontation as did I on a certain KTX trip. Or, last weekend I went to eat at Outback and when my friends and I were seated the table of four next to us moved tables. Taxi Drivers will keep going instead of picking you up. Koreans will cut in front of you in any line at any place. Why? How rude! I have come to realize that there is a country-wide lack of common decency in respect to the treatment of strangers and foreigners. They will stare at you, be short with you, always assume that you are up to no good, and generally treat you as "less-than Korean". This does not jive with me. These are just a few examples of the many, many countless experiences I have had that do not bode well for my opinion of Korea and its people.
I reflected on this briefly a couple of nights ago, as well as my teaching experience here (and by the way, I have concluded with out question that Korean students are far more unruly and disrespectful than American). I came up with a few questions in my meditation that I have yet to answer and perhaps you can weigh in on if you like.
1) Is it bad to not like a culture?
2) Can you not like a culture yet still respect it (the answer seems quite simply to be yes when you are considering it from outsiders perspective; however it is different when you are neck-deep in a differnt culture)?
3) What does it say about you if you find a particular culture to be unsettling and unattractive? Are you narrow-minded? Are you unaccepting?
I thought of the movie "The Mission" in which the Spanish colonists are hearing the testimony of the cardinal in regards to the future of the native people. The antagonist arises and in a five minute speech speaks to the horrid, primitive culture of the native South Americans. I even went so far as to accuse myself of this short-sightedness. Perhaps I am being short in my judgements. Maybe I am just as naive as centuries of explorers who saught to condemn new cultures simply because they are different; although I have no plans to persecute the Koreans! Or maybe my seven months here is a legitimate basis for my conclusions. Hopefully, I will have an answer that is more clear after my year is finished.
KICKS ASS: I have found a safe haven in exercise and self-improvement.
SUCKS ASS: Having to dedicate myself daily-anew to trying my hardest at work and being patient with the kids.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
One Disappointment After Another
Wow! So I don't think that a more hyped up weekend could have been any more of a let down than it was. It was the classic example of everyone telling you it is the best movie they have ever seen which causes you to set unrealistic expectations for the movie. And the movie inevitably ends up being less than great. Such was the case with Mudfest.
We arrived rather late in the day, later than I would have liked to get there, and got on the beach by 3:00 or 3:30. We arrived around 2:00 and had no idea where our hotel was, so we did quite a bit of walking around, probably close to an hour, on one of the more hot and humid days of the summer. If you know me then you understand my disposition at this point. Once we get to the hotel we find that there are no beds, and we will be sleeping on the floor; SWEET!!! We get change and finally get to the beach. We jump in the water for about fifteen minutes and decide to head down to the main pavillion where all the festivities are. By this time my faith in the trip has been restored, and I am ready to have a great time again. We get down there, and I see that there are quite a lot of muddy people. There is nowhere near 20,000 as I was told there would be. There was probably more like 1/10th of that, which was still enough to make the lines for all the mud-covering areas a headache for the buzzing, unmuddied twenty-five year-old. By the time we had walked all the way from our hotel (30min. walk), gotten covered in mud, and taken a dip in the ocean it was nearly six'o clock, dark, and starting to storm.
At the main pavillion there was a mudbath where fifty people at a time would climb in and cover themselves with mud. From there, you could move to a big inflatable King-of-the-Mountain with mud or a big inflatable mud wrestling pit. We went into the mud wrestling pit; it was a bad idea. I got an elbow to the crown of my head and kneed in the back of my calf, a deep bruise which has inhibited me from running for two days now. Eventually, the humidity, crowds, and excessive traversing of Daecheong Beach caught up with us, and we headed back to change for the evening.
When we got back we were so exhausted that we passed out for nearly two hours and finally made it out around 8:30. On the long walk back to the main mudfest area it began to rain quite a bit. So now that we are in nice clothes we are sweaty and wet from rain and humidity. We had a mediocre dinner and set out to see what the night had in store. About two hours later, I found myself downtown trying to find where our group went. Many of them knew other people there and scattered the second we got downtown. I didn't so after spending time trying to find members of our group I got frustrated and walked 30 minutes back to the hotel and went to sleep. Along the way it began to rain tropical storm-style all over me. At that point I tripped over my sandal and fell in some muddy bushes. This put a cap on an already stellar day!!
I woke up the next day around 11 expecting to go to the beach and perhaps salvage the weekend; however, unbeknownst to me, we were leaving on a bus at 1:30 and would not spend anymore time on the beach. The bus ride back was slow and tedious with a bus driver who was fairly relaxed when it came to the bus schedule, and our trip took an hour and a half longer than it should have.
After all was said and done, I was quite frustrated and very disappointed, especially after all the great things I had heard. I am tired of typing now and have a couple more things to say. I do have two more classes and will end here for the day. I hope that this post didn't depress you as much as the living of it did for me. Have a great week! Be back tomorrow with the rest.
We arrived rather late in the day, later than I would have liked to get there, and got on the beach by 3:00 or 3:30. We arrived around 2:00 and had no idea where our hotel was, so we did quite a bit of walking around, probably close to an hour, on one of the more hot and humid days of the summer. If you know me then you understand my disposition at this point. Once we get to the hotel we find that there are no beds, and we will be sleeping on the floor; SWEET!!! We get change and finally get to the beach. We jump in the water for about fifteen minutes and decide to head down to the main pavillion where all the festivities are. By this time my faith in the trip has been restored, and I am ready to have a great time again. We get down there, and I see that there are quite a lot of muddy people. There is nowhere near 20,000 as I was told there would be. There was probably more like 1/10th of that, which was still enough to make the lines for all the mud-covering areas a headache for the buzzing, unmuddied twenty-five year-old. By the time we had walked all the way from our hotel (30min. walk), gotten covered in mud, and taken a dip in the ocean it was nearly six'o clock, dark, and starting to storm.
At the main pavillion there was a mudbath where fifty people at a time would climb in and cover themselves with mud. From there, you could move to a big inflatable King-of-the-Mountain with mud or a big inflatable mud wrestling pit. We went into the mud wrestling pit; it was a bad idea. I got an elbow to the crown of my head and kneed in the back of my calf, a deep bruise which has inhibited me from running for two days now. Eventually, the humidity, crowds, and excessive traversing of Daecheong Beach caught up with us, and we headed back to change for the evening.
When we got back we were so exhausted that we passed out for nearly two hours and finally made it out around 8:30. On the long walk back to the main mudfest area it began to rain quite a bit. So now that we are in nice clothes we are sweaty and wet from rain and humidity. We had a mediocre dinner and set out to see what the night had in store. About two hours later, I found myself downtown trying to find where our group went. Many of them knew other people there and scattered the second we got downtown. I didn't so after spending time trying to find members of our group I got frustrated and walked 30 minutes back to the hotel and went to sleep. Along the way it began to rain tropical storm-style all over me. At that point I tripped over my sandal and fell in some muddy bushes. This put a cap on an already stellar day!!
I woke up the next day around 11 expecting to go to the beach and perhaps salvage the weekend; however, unbeknownst to me, we were leaving on a bus at 1:30 and would not spend anymore time on the beach. The bus ride back was slow and tedious with a bus driver who was fairly relaxed when it came to the bus schedule, and our trip took an hour and a half longer than it should have.
After all was said and done, I was quite frustrated and very disappointed, especially after all the great things I had heard. I am tired of typing now and have a couple more things to say. I do have two more classes and will end here for the day. I hope that this post didn't depress you as much as the living of it did for me. Have a great week! Be back tomorrow with the rest.
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Sorry to Make You Wait
I was going to post this week; however, over the past two weeks my life has been pretty mundane. The 4th of July was a lot of fun because there was a big foreigner picnic. There are a ton of Canadians here, and Canada Day is July 3rd. It was a huge celebration of America and that backwards country to the north.
I am going to add that in my post that you will be able to read Sunday morning. Why am I putting it off. I am going to Mudfest this weekend. I was not going to go, but I was told that a massive celebration (the Korean Carnivale) with 20,000 people covered in mud at the beach with games and fireworks was not something to be missed. I figured it would make for a very interesting blog, and I would just include the one or two small things from the last two weeks as well.
See you soon, figuratively of course!!
Will
I am going to add that in my post that you will be able to read Sunday morning. Why am I putting it off. I am going to Mudfest this weekend. I was not going to go, but I was told that a massive celebration (the Korean Carnivale) with 20,000 people covered in mud at the beach with games and fireworks was not something to be missed. I figured it would make for a very interesting blog, and I would just include the one or two small things from the last two weeks as well.
See you soon, figuratively of course!!
Will
Monday, June 29, 2009
A Long Time Coming
Quite a bit has happened over the last two or so weeks since I last wrote in my blog. I had my 25th birthday and Michael Jackson died on it, Farrah Fawcett, Ed McMahon, and Billy Mays passed along with him. I went to Busan, a trip that I admittedly was a little worried about and had a great time with my friends Jack, Colleen, and Jermil, as well as some new friends Jacob and William. I met a wonderful Lady named Kay Kim, I lost and found my phone, and had a silly night out with co-workers. On top of all of this, I have gained at least ten pounds in a birthday weekend food binge of unfathomable proportions!!
First off, I am now twenty-five, a quarter-of-a-century old. I have spent 25 years on this planet, and I asked myself, "What do I have to show for it?" The reflections, to say the least, were less than satisfying. This is the first birthday where I felt that I was truly getting older and to couple that with the restless feeling that accompanies my sense of idleness here, did not leave me feeling good. But, this can be changed rather easily, and I have conceded that at the end of this year it will be time to pursue a career.
My birthday was supposed to pass without event, the way I typically like to enjoy my special day; however, my friends here had other plans. It involved a college birthday throwback celebration (use your imagination). It was quite a lot of fun. The only problem I had with that was when I woke up my jeans had black stains on them from the asphalt, and my phone had gone missing. It was still a great night, and I am forever thankful to Chris, Sean, Allen, Andrew, and Ashley for helping me celebrate. One thing this celebration also did was remind me how much I miss my old days of partying with all of my friends in ATL and Orlando!!
The next day at work the academy that I work at threw a surprise part for me, and I got out of two classes to enjoy cake, fried chicken, and doughnuts. Like I said, I ruined all of my dietary efforts, and it will take at least two weeks to get back to where I was. Friday night I was invited by my co-workers to have dinner and a few drinks. There was yet another surprise party consisting of beer, smoked-sausage (They love it here as a snack to eat while drinking, and they eat it in large portions!), and then some more cake. We had a small food fight in the restaurant, which did not go over well with the owner, and I spilt ketchup all over a nice RL oxford shirt, YESSSS!! Then we left the restaurant and headed to a Noribang, a place with several small rooms where groups friends can go and sing karaoke. You may have seen such a place in "Lost in Translation" with Bill Murray and Scarlett Johansenn. Anyways, I opened the night off with a MJ tribute of "Beat It" followed by Bon Jovi's "Dead or Alive" and finally capped it all of with "faithfully" by Journey. I was hot to trot!
Saturday I woke up and gathered myself for the most tedious four mile run I have ever done. I felt like poo because I didn't go to bed until four and the last thing I had eaten was crappy Korean beer and Sweet Potato cake (actually quite awesome!). But, I got it done and felt entitled to enjoy a night out in Busan with Jack and Colleen. At first I was a little apprehensive about the trip because I didn't know all who would be going, I didn't have my phone still, I didn't have much money, and I didn't know all the details of the trip. I just knew I was heading to Busan for a Sunday Rafting Trip. The trip was AWESOME!! It was a blast to see Jack and Colleen again because I hadn't seen them in sometime, and I met a guy name Jacob who is really laid back and blast to hang out with. The rafting race started at 10:30 on the brightest day I can remember in a long time! God was getting back at the boozers! We didn't do to well but there were a lot of cool foreigners and the Koreans in the race were gracious and lively hosts; it will truly be one of my cherished memories here. After the race, in which we placed fourth, we were allowed to take the boats out for fun. Our team decided we were going to take the raft really far out. Along the way we battled with other boats full of Koreans, splashing them and boarding there vessels for wrestling matches. On the way back I decided it would be a good idea to go for a swim and plopped right into the water. I definitely did not estimate correctly the distance from shore. It turned into quite an exhausting swim full of cramps and mouths of salt water! To ease my appetite that I worked up during the swim, I decided to go to Popeye's Chicken and eat the family platter; No lie! Not the best life decision I have ever made.
At Busan Station I check my email only to see that my cell phone had been found by Mr. Choi, a trusty neighborhood restaurant owner and my friend. He had passed it on to another trusted neighborhood friend, Candace the Canadian. I met her and a friend Allen for dinner on Sunday night. Lots of food capped off with 31 Flavors! I got my phone and found that it had not been misused (only in Korea!!). It was found in a gutter the day after I lost it by a city worker that lives in Wolpyeong Dong, which is where I work but a fifty minute walk from where I live. Needless to say, I owe a large debt of gratitude to the Choister!
Also during the weekend, on Saturday morning I chanced to meet a middle-aged woman who lived in New York for eight years. She was fluent in both English and Korean and told me her name was Kay Kim. She is a chaplain at a local hospital and was the same while living in the U.S. Her daughter still lives in the U.S. and attends Juliard. She was very nice, and we talked for quite some time while walking to our respective apartments. When we parted she gave me her number and suggested that we get coffee sometime this week. I definitely intend to do so considering that it is a very good thing to have relationships with good Korean citizens. The only thing that I am worried about is that she might try to witness to me if I go to meet her. Korean Christians are very strong and outspoken about their religious views and will try their best to talk to anyone about it. It is not that I am closed minded, but I don't want to get drawn into a religious debate with a nice, older lady. I hope that it just evolves into a quaint friendship that gives me even greater insight into Korean culture.
KICKS ASS: I took a trip to Seoul a couple weeks ago as well, and it was the best trip of my life. I met this girl named Christine who is the funniest girl I have ever met. Sean, Allen, Andrew, Christine, and I went to Itaewon, a big foreigner spot and had the time of our lives. We pulled a serious Sunday Funday and went home as happy as pie.
SUCKS ASS: I didn't get any of my mom's unbelievable Mandarin Orange Cake for my bday as is usually the case. I was not able to see my family for my bday which stinks or the ATL O-Town crews.
Thanks to all for your warm birthday wishes. The cards and packages were very special!
DID NOT PROOFREAD
First off, I am now twenty-five, a quarter-of-a-century old. I have spent 25 years on this planet, and I asked myself, "What do I have to show for it?" The reflections, to say the least, were less than satisfying. This is the first birthday where I felt that I was truly getting older and to couple that with the restless feeling that accompanies my sense of idleness here, did not leave me feeling good. But, this can be changed rather easily, and I have conceded that at the end of this year it will be time to pursue a career.
My birthday was supposed to pass without event, the way I typically like to enjoy my special day; however, my friends here had other plans. It involved a college birthday throwback celebration (use your imagination). It was quite a lot of fun. The only problem I had with that was when I woke up my jeans had black stains on them from the asphalt, and my phone had gone missing. It was still a great night, and I am forever thankful to Chris, Sean, Allen, Andrew, and Ashley for helping me celebrate. One thing this celebration also did was remind me how much I miss my old days of partying with all of my friends in ATL and Orlando!!
The next day at work the academy that I work at threw a surprise part for me, and I got out of two classes to enjoy cake, fried chicken, and doughnuts. Like I said, I ruined all of my dietary efforts, and it will take at least two weeks to get back to where I was. Friday night I was invited by my co-workers to have dinner and a few drinks. There was yet another surprise party consisting of beer, smoked-sausage (They love it here as a snack to eat while drinking, and they eat it in large portions!), and then some more cake. We had a small food fight in the restaurant, which did not go over well with the owner, and I spilt ketchup all over a nice RL oxford shirt, YESSSS!! Then we left the restaurant and headed to a Noribang, a place with several small rooms where groups friends can go and sing karaoke. You may have seen such a place in "Lost in Translation" with Bill Murray and Scarlett Johansenn. Anyways, I opened the night off with a MJ tribute of "Beat It" followed by Bon Jovi's "Dead or Alive" and finally capped it all of with "faithfully" by Journey. I was hot to trot!
Saturday I woke up and gathered myself for the most tedious four mile run I have ever done. I felt like poo because I didn't go to bed until four and the last thing I had eaten was crappy Korean beer and Sweet Potato cake (actually quite awesome!). But, I got it done and felt entitled to enjoy a night out in Busan with Jack and Colleen. At first I was a little apprehensive about the trip because I didn't know all who would be going, I didn't have my phone still, I didn't have much money, and I didn't know all the details of the trip. I just knew I was heading to Busan for a Sunday Rafting Trip. The trip was AWESOME!! It was a blast to see Jack and Colleen again because I hadn't seen them in sometime, and I met a guy name Jacob who is really laid back and blast to hang out with. The rafting race started at 10:30 on the brightest day I can remember in a long time! God was getting back at the boozers! We didn't do to well but there were a lot of cool foreigners and the Koreans in the race were gracious and lively hosts; it will truly be one of my cherished memories here. After the race, in which we placed fourth, we were allowed to take the boats out for fun. Our team decided we were going to take the raft really far out. Along the way we battled with other boats full of Koreans, splashing them and boarding there vessels for wrestling matches. On the way back I decided it would be a good idea to go for a swim and plopped right into the water. I definitely did not estimate correctly the distance from shore. It turned into quite an exhausting swim full of cramps and mouths of salt water! To ease my appetite that I worked up during the swim, I decided to go to Popeye's Chicken and eat the family platter; No lie! Not the best life decision I have ever made.
At Busan Station I check my email only to see that my cell phone had been found by Mr. Choi, a trusty neighborhood restaurant owner and my friend. He had passed it on to another trusted neighborhood friend, Candace the Canadian. I met her and a friend Allen for dinner on Sunday night. Lots of food capped off with 31 Flavors! I got my phone and found that it had not been misused (only in Korea!!). It was found in a gutter the day after I lost it by a city worker that lives in Wolpyeong Dong, which is where I work but a fifty minute walk from where I live. Needless to say, I owe a large debt of gratitude to the Choister!
Also during the weekend, on Saturday morning I chanced to meet a middle-aged woman who lived in New York for eight years. She was fluent in both English and Korean and told me her name was Kay Kim. She is a chaplain at a local hospital and was the same while living in the U.S. Her daughter still lives in the U.S. and attends Juliard. She was very nice, and we talked for quite some time while walking to our respective apartments. When we parted she gave me her number and suggested that we get coffee sometime this week. I definitely intend to do so considering that it is a very good thing to have relationships with good Korean citizens. The only thing that I am worried about is that she might try to witness to me if I go to meet her. Korean Christians are very strong and outspoken about their religious views and will try their best to talk to anyone about it. It is not that I am closed minded, but I don't want to get drawn into a religious debate with a nice, older lady. I hope that it just evolves into a quaint friendship that gives me even greater insight into Korean culture.
KICKS ASS: I took a trip to Seoul a couple weeks ago as well, and it was the best trip of my life. I met this girl named Christine who is the funniest girl I have ever met. Sean, Allen, Andrew, Christine, and I went to Itaewon, a big foreigner spot and had the time of our lives. We pulled a serious Sunday Funday and went home as happy as pie.
SUCKS ASS: I didn't get any of my mom's unbelievable Mandarin Orange Cake for my bday as is usually the case. I was not able to see my family for my bday which stinks or the ATL O-Town crews.
Thanks to all for your warm birthday wishes. The cards and packages were very special!
DID NOT PROOFREAD
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